Words with Friends Etiquette

You wouldn't think that a fun game like Words with Friends would require its own etiquette, would you?
But it does.
One thing that irks me about that game is the "rematch" feature. Whenever you finish a game with someone, it says, "Rematch?" which isn't really a problem, except that it presents the option to both people playing. If both people playing say, "Yes! Rematch!" it doesn't set you up with one new game; it sets you up with two.

And if you remain apathetic about it and play both games anyway, you'll finish both games and get presented with "Rematch?" again, and you'll probably repeat your actions and choose to answer yes again, and then you and your friend will have four games going, which isn't much fun as it becomes a very confusing chore.

One way to fix this is to choose a rematch, and then deny your friend's game. But that can come across as rude, and it can hurt your friend's feelings since it shows up on their device as "Blahblahface turned down your request."

What I think would really fix this problem and others relating to Words with Friends is some simple etiquette:


Rule #1: The loser retains the right to a rematch.

If you beat someone and rematch them, it's kind of mean.

 But if you lose, then you have every right to a rematch.

Rule #2: Don't whine about your assortment of letters. It annoys people.

It has been said of my English teacher-whiz of a mother, "It's amazing how she can score a thousand points with four vowels and a piece of lint on the screen." (Or something like that.)


Rule #3: Whether you're winning or losing, have no mercy. Don't play dumb if your friend never plays a word above 10 points. There is no room for pity or mercy in the arena of Words with Friends.

(An ibex is a wild goat, by the way.)

In fact, people use playing dumb as weapon sometimes. They wait for you to begin playing weak words in pity, and then they whip out their big letters and obliterate you. You must defend yourself early.

Rule #4: Don't brag about your achievements.

It makes people angry and bloodthirsty for your demise.

Yay, have fun!

(If you are technologically deficient and possibly old, and have no idea what I'm talking about but read this whole thing anyway, go here.)