Thursday, May 10, 2012

Bearnicorn for President

I have found a worthy candidate for the presidency of the United States. His name is Bearnicorn.

"But bearnicorns cannot run for president. Only humans can," you say. Well think again! Bears, especially bearnicorns, behave better than many politicians.

Here are eight reasons why you should vote for Mr. Bearnicorn in November:

1) He can protect you.

2) He loves everyone.

3) He doesn't let people control him.

4) His horn may or may not have magical properties.

5) He is honest.

6) His solutions to problems are simple and can be easily understood.

7) He is committed to excellence.

8) His speeches are incredibly inspiring.

Well, Mr. Bearnicorn will probably eat your legs either way, but if you vote for him, he will also eat politicians' legs.

So vote for Mr. Bearnicorn 2012!

Thursday, May 3, 2012

Peyton Manning

Marketing things is difficult for sellers and for buyers. People have a hard time deciding which brand of something to buy. A name-brand product? A generic version? With so many options, people get overwhelmed. They stare at the shelves in the supermarket until they dissolve into puddles of confusion.

However, in East Tennessee (especially Knoxville), there is a solution for this marketing dilemma!

If you want to sell something in Knoxville, just slap Peyton Manning's face on it! People will choose it over anything!

Here are some examples:

But when you add Peyton Manning's face...

Peyton Manning can sell anything.

But when you add Peyton Manning's face...

One more example: